Family problems are everywhere. Have you ever considered that you might be the answer?
I had a conversation with someone recently about parenting and family. Parents have a huge impact on their children with everything they do, good or bad. No matter how hard they try to get it right, many fail, make mistakes, have to make tough decisions, and some don’t even try at all. It is no surprise that a lot of people blame family problems e.g. their parents or siblings or other family members for how their lives turned out. A research conducted with over 30,000 people from 72 countries showed that blaming parents does not help people move on, instead it brings more risk.
If you feel that your family are to blame for how your life has turned out, or that the decisions they made for you contributed to your lack of success, wasted years from life, put you on the wrong career path, pressured you to marry the wrong person, or made you lose out on the right person, please be encouraged and keep trusting God who can restore!
They probably tried and made what they thought were the right decisions. Maybe they tried to keep it together only for it to fall apart years later. But despite all their shortcomings, failures, wrong decisions, and more, you still turned out well. God kept you. The scars are there, but you are still standing, with hope, with more wisdom, with faith.
Becoming the answer to Family Problems
One of the reasons Joseph’s brothers hated him was because their father clearly showed favouritism, giving him unfair preferential treatment. The brothers’ hatred grew so much that they planned to kill him, but sold him as a slave instead. God kept Joseph, and some years after, he became a top ranked official in Egypt who was in charge of the country’s food supply chain.
Joseph could have chosen to blame his entire family for the challenges he’d been through including jail time, but he didn’t. Here’s what Joseph said:
But God sent me on ahead of you to keep your families alive and to save you in this wonderful way.
God made Joseph the answer to his family’s prayers. He could have decided to reject it, and watch them suffer and die in retaliation.
It takes humility and sacrifice to accept that despite the family problems and shortcomings, God can make you the answer to their prayers. That you turned out right, didn’t give up, had a breakthrough, even when they didn’t support you, could be God saying that you are the answer to their prayer. This doesn’t mean the family problems will go away, but it may give you a different way to approach them.
If you’ve been hurt, I pray for healing for you. God is your provider and He is enough.
Resist the temptation to fight back. Stay away from toxic environment or discussions. Do everything you can to trigger more blessings, not curses. The first commandment with a promise says ‘Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee’ – Exodus 20:12. It didn’t say only honor a good, rich, caring, and responsible father and mother.
As we celebrate Easter, remember that Jesus became the answer and died on the cross to save humanity. His father sacrificed him on that sad Friday in our place. But by Easter Sunday, He resurrected and gave us a new life. When you look back at Friday, it wasn’t a sad Friday anymore, it became a Good Friday.
Sometimes, it all makes sense when we look back, but for now, trust God to be your Jehovah Jireh.
Be encouraged with this song Jireh by Elevation Worship & Maverick City.